Welcome to the Sugary Scoop, my free weekly newsletter where I help you see and experience the magic of NYC that I love so much through curated events, experiences, artists, and community stories.

What’s new this week?

An Open Call

As Sugary’s social media content continues in its development, I am putting the word out to my community.

I am seeking additional help with all things content related on both the creation and strategy side of things.

It’s been a long time coming but it’s time to meet the moment with greater support in an area that I’ve always been averse to.

Don’t know why it’s taking me so long to ask, maybe it was a thought that I could handle it on my own. 

I can’t.

And it’s ok. 

Lord knows I have enough to worry about :-).

So if you live for making content, this message is definitely for you.

Reach out and let’s chat.  It’s time to reach a broader audience and I’ll be grateful for your help in doing it.

I look forward to hearing back from some of you!  

Sugary 🍬

A 20% Stakeholder...

America has turned 250.

And it’s kinda funny to come to the realization that I’ve had a front row seat by birthright for nearly 1/5 of this nation’s history.

Wild.

It’s an interesting thing to reflect on nearly five decades of a star spangled life.

Every decade has had its unique characteristics, but there have been some consistent characteristics both good and bad that I’ve come to understand about my nation over the years.

We NEVER sit still. And I’m in the city that is the epitome of this spirit. There’s always forward movement, hell you could even argue there’s even certain parts of the NYC economy that literally survives on this process alone. We are pioneers at our core and we’re always looking for what’s on the horizon and how we fit into that discussion.  Whether it’s building railroads, moving west, ushering in the digital economy, launching startups, moving online, or embracing AI, the relentless pace of imposed progress is the clearest drumbeat of our society.

This country is all about the individual. Sure teamwork makes the dream work, but we are cowboys at our core weaned on stories of “going at it alone” and being that rebel without a cause.  This is tied closely to the classic underdog story, and while we didn’t invent the concept, we certainly romanticize and embrace it as if it was our very DNA.  It doesn’t matter what costume you wear, be it a founder, corporate titan, influencer or creator a high premium is placed on the perception that you got there largely by yourself, with little to no help.

The 80’s recession, Cold War, 9/11, the Financial Crisis of ‘08, COVID… all terrible moments in our nation’s history… yet no matter what happens, or how bad things seem to get, there’s this almost perpetual sense that things will ultimately work out.  To anyone outside looking in, we can seem delusional, yet it’s because of this very kind of magical thinking that we gain strength right when we need it most.

While America may be exceptional in many ways, it is far from perfect. 

These are some the shortcomings I think have really harmed us and will continue harming us unless we are inspired to change:

There is a price tag for virtually everything, as long as you’re willing and able to pay for it.  Sure there are limitless ways to make a profit be it person, product or policy…but the question is always, “at whose expense?”  Questionable food practices (production and consumption), a real estate bubble, an opioid crisis, a digitally induced loneliness epidemic…We’re so busy chasing the all mighty dollar that we rarely stop to think about this.  The result? Countless citizens are impacted in detrimental ways just for the benefit of the relative few...this is also a trauma we export to other countries as well. 

We very much view ourselves as the example for the rest of the world.  For a while across the decades we even had most of the world believing that.  We have a very high opinion of ourselves even though if you really look under the hood, we have long ago forfeited any chance at a moral high ground.  

Exporting democracy through military intervention, significant civic and cultural inequalities as well as a profound disinterest in caring for the health and well being of our own people…this is all part of our portfolio beneath preserving the pristine veneer of being “that shining city upon a hill”.

At best, we’re on par with other morally ambiguous countries that we look down upon without acknowledging our own profound shortcomings. Lofty ideals paired with imperfect behavior.

It isn’t God save the queen, it’s God save Kylie Jenner, or Logan Paul, or Taylor Swift.  We don’t have royalty like they do across the pond, so our anointed icons take the shape of celebrities.  And not just exceptional talent as it used to be, but our definition of celebrity has expanded to anyone with a phone and a semi-impressive amount of followers.  We obsess over them, aspire to be them, buy what they tell us to buy and elevate them to a rarified status that makes us vulnerable when the idea of celebrity is used as a tool to bend the will of the masses.

I suppose perhaps it makes sense that a larger than life nation has a penchant for excess.  Sometimes our preoccupation with this leads to hilariously ridiculous moments, but most of the time it’s pretty wasteful and gluttonous.  Most of our nation’s health and environmental issues are predicated on this very fact. “Bigger” and “Better” have never been synonyms even if we force the two ideas together as if they were conjoined twins.

America has always been a nation chasing “more.” More freedom. More opportunities. More prosperity. More influence. More equality. More innovation. More attention. More growth.  

More, more, more, more…

Sometimes that pursuit has produced humanity’s greatest achievements.

But many times it has also produced our greatest excesses.

The story of America’s first 250 years isn’t simply about becoming bigger. It’s about how we got bigger.

The main question that we need to wrestle with for the next 250 years is…  

Deciding what, exactly, is worth becoming more of.

Happy 250 America…

Sugary 🍬

Obsession

Sometimes the most unsettling horror films are about monsters, but we’re not talking about the ones allegedly living under our bed since we were children. No, the type of monster I’m referring to as far more insidious and lives within our own desperations.

Premiering in the Midnight Madness section of the Toronto International Film Festival before receiving a theatrical release, Obsession has become one of the year's most remarkable success stories. Produced for a reported budget of just ~$750,000, the independent horror film has gone on to gross approximately $370–375 million worldwide at the time of this writing, making it one of the most profitable original films of the decade and launching its first time feature director/writer Curry Barker into the spotlight as one of horror's most exciting new voices.

After hearing endless news about this development, I had to check it out myself and see what the buzz was about…

…and I gotta say, it REALLY lives up to the hype.

***SPOILER ALERT***

Obsession follows Bear, a lonely music store employee who is incapable of mustering the gumption and wherewithal to finally dare to try and win the heart of his longtime friend Nikki.  Instead, Bear by chance discovers a seemingly juvenile toy, a Wishing Willow, capable of granting a single wish, and Bear uses the object to make her fall in love with him.

At first, it appears his deepest wish has come true. But Nikki's “devotion” reveals its true colors rapidly as every possible relationship trope relating to clinginess, emotional dependence, and irrational impassioned behavior are taken to extreme levels yielding horrifying unintended consequences.

"Be careful what you wish for" never felt more relevant as a statement than now.  

Rather than treating it as a fantasy fulfilled, the film transforms it into a chilling meditation on loneliness, obsession, and the dangerous belief that affection can somehow be earned through control.

At its core, Obsession is a film about entitlement masquerading as romance.

Bear isn't introduced as a villain. He's awkward, isolated, socially anxious, and deeply lonely, the kind of character many viewers instinctively sympathize with, and in many cases, can even identify with.

As a guy who has experienced more than his fair share of an “awkward phase”, I found myself easily relating to the pain of unrequited and unexpressed love for someone we wished so desperately we had the courage to ask out…and that would love us back…guaranteed.

You see, that last word “guaranteed”…that’s the doozy. 

That empathy is intentional. The film slowly asks audiences to reconsider where loneliness ends and entitlement begins.

At first glance it seems Bear's “supernatural intervention” is rather innocent, something any guy might do as a sort of Hail Mary in the name of love that anyone might get behind because it feels innocent enough.

We might cheer for him at first because he is also presented as the underdog.

But there is something more nefarious embedded between the lines.

Rather than accepting Nikki's lack of romantic interest, the Wishing Willow is a metaphor for bypassing one of the fundamental truths of human relationships: love cannot be manufactured, negotiated, or compelled.

The horror doesn't begin when Nikki becomes obsessive.

The horror begins the moment Bear decides her choice no longer matters.

He would rather control her and get the outcome he always wanted than try to court her and risk rejection and/or failure because that kind of outcome is both scary and too painful for him to face.

Instead of asking, How can I become someone she might genuinely choose? he asks, How can I make her choose me?

While Nikki may become the face of the horror, Bear remains its architect.

Bear is a coward and within that cowardice is the seed bed for villainous intent to take root.

In recent years, conversations around male loneliness have become increasingly visible. Many men report feeling isolated, disconnected, and unsuccessful in forming meaningful romantic relationships. Scott Galloway talks about it endlessly. Obsession taps directly into that cultural conversation, but it refuses to suggest that loneliness itself is the problem. Instead, it explores what happens when loneliness evolves into the belief that affection is something one is owed.

There are no guarantees in life and certainly not in love.. Putting yourself out there will always be the risk you have to choose over and over again if you want the chance for it to one day work out possibly.

In recognizing this overall message, you discover an unexpected moral weight within what is supposedly just a simple horror film done well.

Obsession quietly reminds us that authentic love has value precisely because it is freely given. Every relationship depends on the ability to say both "yes" or "no." Once that freedom disappears, so does the relationship.

Beneath the scares is a story about one of the oldest human desires: to be chosen. But Obsession argues that being chosen only matters when the choice is real.

And as it turns out, love stripped of free will can quickly become something darker…far far darker.

 Sugary 🍬

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Thank you for taking the time to read to the end!

I hope you found something inspiring and meaningful in my content and until next time, explore the possibilities of NYC.

-Sugary

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